What is a picky eater?
The peak time for picky eating is the toddler or preschool years. A picky eater:
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complains about or refuses specific foods, especially vegetables and meats
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pushes foods around the plate
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hides foods or gives it to a pet under the table
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eats enough total foods and calories per day
What causes it?
Children of all ages (and adults) commonly have a few food dislikes. Sometimes children dislike foods because of their colour,
but more often it's because they are difficult to chew. Children accept tender meats better than tough ones, and well-cooked
vegetables better than raw. Some children are repulsed by foods with a bitter taste. Occasionally a child who gags on large
pieces of all foods has large tonsils that make it difficult to swallow.
How long does it last?
Most children who are picky eaters will try new foods in the school years because of peer pressure. The voracious appetite
during the adolescent years also increases the willingness to experiment. If you try to force your child to eat a food he
doesn't like, he may gag or even vomit. Force feedings always interfere with the normal pleasure of eating and eventually
decrease the appetite.
How can you help your child?
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Try to prepare a main dish that everyone likes.
Try to avoid any unusual main dish that your child strongly dislikes. Some children don't like foods that are mixed together,
such as casseroles. Try reintroducing such dishes when your child is older.
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Allow occasional substitutes for the main dish.
If your child refuses to eat the main dish and this is an unusual request, you may allow a substitute dish. An acceptable
substitute would be breakfast cereal or a simple sandwich the child prepares for himself. Never become a short-order cook
and prepare any extra foods for mealtime. The child should know that you expect him to learn to eat the main dish that has
been prepared for the family.
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Respect any strong food dislikes.
If your child has a few strong food dislikes (especially any food that makes him gag), do not serve that food to him when
it's prepared as part of the family meal. Never pressure your child to eat all foods. It will only lead to a power struggle,
gagging, or even vomiting.
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Don't worry about vegetables, just encourage more fruits.
Because vegetables tend to be hard to chew and some of them are bitter, they are commonly rejected by children and even by
many adults. Keep in mind that fruits and vegetables are from the same food group. There are no essential vegetables. Vegetables
can be entirely replaced by fruits without any nutritional harm to your child. This is not a health issue. Don't make your
child feel guilty about avoiding some vegetables.
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Don't allow complaining about food at meal times.
Have a rule that it's okay to decline a serving of a particular food or to push it to the side of the plate. Make it clear
that complaining about it is unacceptable.
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Ask your child to taste new foods.
Many tastes are acquired. Your child may eventually learn that he likes a food he initially refuses. For some picky eaters,
it may take seeing other people eat a certain food 10 times before they're even willing to taste it, and another 10 times
of tasting it before they develop a liking for it. Don't try to rush this normal process of adapting to new foods. Trying
to force a child to eat one bite of a food per year of age is not helpful with most picky eaters. Instead, it's better to
trust them when they say that they have tasted the food in question.
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Don't argue about dessert.
An unnecessary area of friction for picky eaters is a rule that if you don't clean your plate, you can't have any dessert.
A better approach might be to allow your child one serving of dessert regardless of what he eats. However, there are no seconds
on dessert for children who don't eat an adequate amount of the main course. Desserts don't have to be sweets, they can be
nutritious desserts such as fruit.
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Don't extend meal time.
Don't keep your child sitting at the dinner table after the rest of the family is done. This will only cause your child to
develop unpleasant associations with meal time.
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Keep meal times pleasant.
Make it an important family event. Draw your children into friendly conversation. Tell them about your day and ask about their
day. Talk about fun subjects unrelated to food. Avoid making it a time for criticism or struggle over control.
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Avoid conversation about eating at any time.
Don't discuss what your child eats in your child's presence. Trust your child's appetite to look after your child's caloric
needs. Also don't give praise for appropriate eating. Don't give bribes or rewards for meeting your eating expectations. Children
should eat to satisfy their appetite, not to please the parent. Occasionally you might praise your child for trying a new
food that he does not like the taste or texture of.
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Consider giving your child a daily multivitamin. Although vitamins are probably unnecessary for most of us, they are not harmful
in normal amounts and may allow you to relax more about your child's eating patterns.
When should you call your child's health care provider?
Call during office hours if:
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your child is losing weight
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your child gags on or vomits certain foods
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you have other questions or concerns
| Last Reviewed | Reviewed by |
| June 21, 2004 | Andrew James, MBChB, FRACP, FRCPC |
