Refusal to Dress

Once a child is old enough to dress himself, the parent should never need to dress him again. Avoid situations where you feel that you are pressured into becoming involved in the dressing process.

The rule
"You're old enough to dress yourself."

Discipline technique
If you're going to stay at home, don't allow your child to watch TV or go outdoors until he is completely dressed. Also, avoid buying clothing that is hard to get on.

Example:
You need to take your child to school, day care, the store, or on some other errand. Your child won't dress himself (despite being able to) and eats breakfast slowly.

The rule
"You must be ready to leave the house by 8:30 each morning because we can't be late to school."

Discipline technique
Logical consequences.

• Give your child 10 minutes' warning before departure, preferably using a kitchen timer. Encourage your child to "beat the timer."
• If your child is not dressed at departure time and you are driving somewhere, put his clothes and shoes in a bag and take him to the car dressed as he is. If he likes, he can try to get dressed in the car, though that will be difficult with the seat belt on. If your child is going to school, try to get there a few minutes late to provide some additional pressure to speed up the next morning. If your child misses a school bus, take him to school yourself, but be sure again that he's a few minutes late.
• Provide breakfast in the morning, but if your child is not finished with breakfast at the time of departure, that is his problem.
• Don't nag during the time your child is stalling and dawdling. By all means don't dress your child at the last minute.
• Praise your child for trying to dress himself, completely dressing himself, dressing himself promptly, or being ready to leave for school or other appointments on time.
• Dress before breakfast. Show your child how you sometimes dress in a hurry.